If you are interested in learning the truth about the realities of the lives of people who are gay or lesbian, here is what you can do...

 

DON'T worry too much about what you should say to people who are gay or lesbian. Just follow Jesus' advice when He said, "Do unto others as you would have them do unto you". Treat them like you would anyone else.

DON'T talk or think about gay and lesbian people as though they were all the same. There are gay and lesbian Republicans, Democrats, and others who don't vote at all, just like in the heterosexual population. A few gay people are "radical" while most others are as mainstream as apple pie. Some gays and lesbians are alike, others are not alike at all.

DO spend some time to talk to gay and lesbian people. Drop your fear of them. At first, a simple "hello, how are you" may be your goal. Afterwards, you may want to get to know more gay and lesbian people personally and invite them into your life and home.

DO try to put yourself into the shoes of a gay or lesbian person as best you can. Imagine how you would feel if many churches, Senators, House Representatives, Presidential candidates, music and sports stars condemned you for simply loving the "wrong" gender.

DON'T think of gay and lesbian people in the context of sex. Being gay or lesbian is not about having sex or about "behavior". Being gay is about being attracted to the same gender.

DON'T bear false witness against your gay and lesbian neighbors. When you hear other people claim that gay people are a danger to children, or that they want to subvert our Christian values, ask them how they know that and then inform them that they are completely wrong.

DO realize that gay and lesbian people, to this day, continue to be defamed on a daily basis, in our communities and in our churches. Think about what it must feel like to have to hear people lying about you, your loved ones and your life, day in and day out. Examine your own speech and see if you are guilty of these things.

DO realize that stereotyping is bearing false witness against your neighbor. Just as it is easy to find a straight person doing something wrong, it is just as easy to find a gay or lesbian person who is doing something wrong. Not all gay people are nice folk, just like all heterosexual people aren't nice, either. Don't let one bad experience with a gay or lesbian person define the millions of us that are living decent, moral lives.

DON'T accept the lie that gay and lesbian people are against "family values". Gay and lesbian people have families, too. They want the same things for their children and loved ones that you want for yours.

DON'T support ministers that bear false witness against their gay and lesbian neighbors. Confront those ministers personally, face to face, if possible, and tell them that the things they say about gay and lesbian people are absolutely wrong.

DO understand that lots of people like to use the Bible to try to lend legitimacy to their already pre-existing views. Understand that just because someone is quoting the Bible doesn't mean that their interpretation or use of the scripture is true.

DO understand that only God, not Dr. Falwell or anyone else, can judge.

DO understand that no one is perfect when it comes to the interpretation of the Holy Bible. Just because someone says that they believe that the Bible is the "inerrant" Word of God does not mean that their interpretation is inerrant.

DON'T just accept what anyone says about gay and lesbian people. When a minister says, "I have witnessed thousands of people who have left the 'gay lifestyle'..." confront him directly. Ask him to show you who and where all of these people are. ASK TO RECEIVE THE NAMES OF THESE THOUSANDS.

DON'T just sit by when you witness verbal gay bashing. If you are at a party and you hear an anti-gay joke or comment, get everyone's attention and let people know that you value gay and lesbian people in your life and that you do not wish to hear such things.

DO understand that gay and lesbian people are not the ones who need to change. It is the bigot who pawns his prejudiced beliefs off on the Bible who needs to change.

DO believe us when we tell you that we did not choose to be gay. Also understand that even if we did choose it, there is nothing wrong with loving someone of the same gender. What the world needs is more loving going on, not less.

DO believe that love, honesty, commitment and caring, not gender, makes a family a family.

DO remember the words of Jesus Christ when He said, "There is only one Lawgiver and Judge, the one who is able to save and destroy. But you: who are you to judge your neighbor? (James 4:12, NIV)

DON'T think that it is better to be straight than to be gay. Understand that everyone has a different experience in life, and that you should never judge anyone until you've walked a mile in their moccasins.

DON'T be afraid to send letters, emails, faxes, or to make phone calls to ministers, politicians, or to anyone else who expresses misinformation about gay people.

DO understand that you can never go wrong by treating a fellow human being with dignity. Merely disagreeing with someone in no way gives any of us the right to treat that person with any less respect than we would treat someone with whom we did agree.

 

"He who does not love does not know God, for God is love."
(1 John 4:8, NKJV)